People on the East Coast probably had about enough of The Weather Channel’s wind-whipped dramatics last week with the Blizzard of 2016 — even though it is important to keep in the loop on potentially life-threatening conditions. True, we all probably have at least one weather program on the smartphone to check in times of need, but if you get tired of the more earnest forecast apps, here are a few that put a decidedly different spin on the weather:
• Funny or Die Weather (for Android and iOS). In addition to actual legit forecasts and current conditions, the FOD app provides plenty of humorous pretend “facts” to entertain. For example, did you know that “Rain drops are just God crying because he’s disappointed in you” or “The humidity of water is extremely high”? Funny or Die Weather is free.
• Swackett (various editions for Android, iOS, Mac and Web). Here’s a weather app that tells you what it’s like outside and then suggests what to wear — like coats, hats and sunglasses — when you do venture out of the house. The company also makes a dog-walking app for iOS that tells you when the weather for the day might be best to take the pup out. Most apps are free or 99 cents, but have in-app purchases for another buck or two to get more content.
• Weather Puppy / Weather Kitty (for iOS and Android). Speaking of pups — and kittens — the Weather Puppy and Weather Kitty apps are still around. These have been around for a few years, and still bring big pictures of adorable fuzzy animals to your weather watch. Both are free, but you can upgrade with in-app purchases for different themes and pets (Grumpy Cat is an option). Some of the money goes to shelters and animal non-profit groups.
Now, if cute or lightly humorous is not your cup of tea in a tempest, you can also find several weather apps that take a more…profane look at your forecast.
For those who don’t mind a little F-bomb with your current conditions, there’s Authentic Weather for Android and iOS. It costs about a buck and bills itself as “probably the most honest weather app.” To prove its point, Authentic Weather often mixes in a dose of profanity with its observations; the screen shown here is one of the milder forecasts. You can snap a photo with the current assessment superimposed over the image, and there’s an active Tumblr online to share your shot.
The free Effing Weather for Android is similar, except without as much overt cussing. If you like your weather with curse words, the freemium Grumpy Weather Widget for Android and iOS is another one of the many apps that fit the bill and even has a bleeped word on its icon. And finally, it you live in New England and want a little regional flavor, check out the two-buck Wicked Weathah app for iOS that sports conditions like “Wicked rainin’ like effin’ cats and dahgs.”
These are just some of the options in your local app store. Yes, these more foul-mouthed weather apps can be a bit juvenile. But let’s face it: That weather app is probably saying exactly what you’re thinking when the storm blows in.